Alright Ladies! Put on your big girl panties!! We need to talk! Next week I'll be running a fabulous column on the L.E.A.D Retreat, sponsored by Fish & Richardson; premiere IP law firm and Katherine Lutton; Chief Counsel, Entrepreneur and Philanthropist. Fabulous empowering women's event. Before we get to that though, I think we need a little closet cleaning about attitudes women have about other women . As I look at women in politics, large corporations, even management in Hollywood, the numbers are appalling. Now granted, I think many old white men need to go away for real change, and yes there are definitely other factors stopping women in their tracks. Male chauvinism is alive and well. It's not as apparent today as it was in the last century but it's still here. It's now called Gender Bias. Boys and young men are being taught to sexually objectify women. Intentionally or not, it's happening Ageism? Are women done after 40? Prejudice? Oh yeah! Race and sexual orientation can knock you further down the ladder of success. Media? Advertising? Billion dollar companies selling products that make you feel less than? When did it become okay for one group of people to tell another group of people that they aren't good enough? I know that women make up 51% of the US population. I also know that when women join forces, they can change the world.
How can women help other women succeed without falling prey to the media machine that eats women daily?" Want to join the dialogue?I came across a fabulous book that everyone should read!" Tripping the Prom Queen- The Truth about Women and Rivalry.
Author Susan Shapiro Barash shines light on how to avoid the booby traps, sorry for the pun girls, and how to help your sister's succeed as you succeed. It actually happens one woman/girl at a time! Where to start? Plan a girl get together and have a Get Real dialogue! Over drinks? Coffee? Your Church or Temple? Just get together and start talking!
Here are3 possible ideas to use as dialogue starters:
The "Not Enough Pie" Syndrome- Is there an finite number of opportunities to go around? Do the women you know have this impression? If something wonderful happens to a woman you know, does that mean you've experienced a "Magical theft" of something that should have happened to you? If you have your own personal goals are you losing out if another woman is winning?
Competition vs Alliance - Do you superficially compare yourselves to other women? Hyper-aware of who's thinner? Younger? Do you voice these opinions to hold a sister down instead of building her up? Does the idea of becoming a mentor help at all?
The Aging Double Standard- Do you find yourself being overly critical of women with fine lines, gray hair? Coloring your hair or taking care of your skin is a wonderful way to refresh your look but is trying to look your best an obsession? Where are the role models in TV and Film? Do you have daughters that are 8 years old that only eat salad because they're afraid of weight gain? 16 year old's getting botox? What is being modeled at home? How do health and well being lead to inner and outer beauty? What does make a woman truly beautiful?
These are just a few conversation starters to explore and discover the truth for yourself. I know for myself as a beauty columnist, I don't use beauty as a weapon. I find myself obsessing around many of these same issues so I want to go along on this journey too.My next columns will take a deeper look at these issues as well as women who drive empowering solutions! I want to hear from you!What did you and your girlfriends uncover in your Get Real dialogue? Let me know what you're thinking!!Are you being held down? How do you empower others? Share your stories with me so I can pass them on!
With love and respect for all things women,